Assalamu'alaikum ..... Irasshai mase~~

Welcome to my writing space..
I may not be somebody but I'm someone in my life...
Feel free to give out your mind ...

Friday 6 July 2012

GOODNESS AND BADNESS !~

Assalamu'alaikum !~
Having a wonderful day ??? If not -  it's okay~ not wonderful day is needed in our life....
There're a lot of things that I want to share but lacking of remembering skill made it hard for me to share...
For now, these things that I want to share are the ones that I managed to dig up in my memory chest....
Bon Apetite~


### Like every Muslim knows that Iblis promised to ALLAH S.W.T that they will drive humans away for heaven ... pulling them one by one to accompany them in Hell ...It is stated inside the Holy Qur'an in Surah Al-A'raf (chapter 7) verse 11-18
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11 - It is We Who created you and gave you shape; then We bade the angels bow down to Adam, and they bowed down; not so Iblis; he refused to be of those who bow down.




12 - (ALLAH) said: "What prevented you from bowing down when I commanded you?" He said: "I am better than he: You did create me from fire, and him from clay."






13 -  (ALLAH) said: "Get you down from this: it is not fro you to be arrogant here: get out, for you are of the meanest (of creatures)."




14 - (Satan) said: "Give me respite till the day they are raised up."



15 - (ALLAH) said: "Be you among those who have respite."



16 - (Satan) said: "Because You have thrown me out of the Way, lo! I will lie in wait for them on your Straight Way




17 - " Then will I assault them from before them and behind them, from their right and their left: nor will You find, in most of them, gratitude (for Your mercies)."



18 - (Allah) said: "Get out from this, disgraced and expelled.  If any of them follow you-Hell will I fill with you all.
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Some ask, if ALLAH is truly the most gracious and the most merciful, why should ALLAH made Hell in the first place ??
The answer is simple ... >>>>
If right now, a man RAPE you (if you're a woman.) or your mother or your sister, is it fair that the judge let the man go away?  because it's the judge's son and he love his son ? not fair right ??
No matter love or not, judgement must be done ! ALLAH have stated it in the Holy Qur'an..
I pick the one from the Surah Al-Imran (Chapter 3) verse 88-89


88 - In that will they dewll; nor will their penalty be lightened, nor respite be their (lot)-


89 - Except for those that repent (even) after that, and make amends; for verily Allah is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful.


See ? Allah gives us time to repent before the judgement day arrive...before we're at our deathbed..before our heart is just so hard that we can't..won't..accept any form of guidance to repent...
So, use the time wisely...


Some also ask, why do ALLAH creates evils ?? Something good can't create something bad...
Well, the surely ALLAH knows it better than us but if we think logically, we can come up with a few reasoning that is not straying from the right path. :--


1 > to test us...and why do we need to be tested ?? answer : to find who's a better person
2 > to make the good things obvious ~~ can u know white when there's no black ??
                                                             ~~ can u know light without darkness ??
                                                             ~~ can u know what's good if there's no bad ??
                                                            @@ if it's good, it's not bad .... if it's bad, it's not good ..


Simple right ??                   


Ok..last one...


there's an ayyah in the holy Qur'an > No compulsion in religion .... (Chapter 1, verse 256)


well, this is truly such a controversial verse.... ok..read this ....


>> A girl..a muslim girl..named Sofiyya..not covering her aurah..she doesn't wear the hijab....then, another girl, let's named her Khadijah...she's a nice and religious ... she ask Sofiyya to cover her aurah. (well, of course, in a nice and polite manner)..since ALLAH instruct us to do it for our own good... BUT Sofiyya said this "La ikrah ha fid din which means, there's no compulsion in Islam right ?? so, don't force me to do it..let me do it on my own will..sooner or later...." Khadijah just smile and said a few things that made Safiyya speechless... The things that Khadijah said contained the explanation below  -->>          


actually dear sisters and brothers, that verse is meant for non-muslim...means that, ALLAH doesn't want us to force them into ISLAM but guide them so they will be a muslim on their own will BUT as for a muslim itself, it sure is a compulsory to follow the injunctions of ALLAH...to avoid HIS prohibitions...to follow HIS instruction... Let me give you an example... I'm a student at IIUM, to graduate from the university, there are a few core course that I need to take....such as Accounting 1, Mathematics, Statistic, Economics and Business.... whether I like it or not...I HAVE TO learn all of it...get a passing score to allow me to graduate.... Well, the same goes for ALLAH's injunctions...if you want to get to heaven, do this (HIS instruction)..if you don't want to go to hell, don't do that (HIS prohibitions)... so choose WISELY ...





Monday 18 June 2012

SHARING EXPERIENCES

Assalamu'alaikum..
Today, I started my class~
First class Accounting... and the next is Basic Themes of Al-Qur'an..
The thing I want to share is what happen in the BTQ class ...
Our lecturer is a very young lecturer in his early 20...Brother Firdaus is what we call him...
A graduate from IIUM in Bachelor in Comparative Religion (major) and Islamic Finance (minor)..
and currently taking master in .... ( can't remember ) in IIUM ..so basically, him becoming our lecturer is some sort of practice...


OKAY...END WITH THE INTRO BOUT HIM..
here's the real deal...


What he told us are very encouraging and interesting~
1) enjoy your life as a student ~
     * enjoy studying ...
     * enjoy playing ...
     * enjoy everything that you do ...
BUT!! there's a very thin line between two types of enjoy ...


ENJOY = PLAYING HAPPILY ALL THE TIME       
         VS
ENJOY = DOING IT SERIOUSLY AND HAPPILY  

2) don't waste your time, your age.. your brain neuron on LOVE
He and his collegues did a research on what is the problem faced by students that makes them fail and so on..The result is LOVE!~

BD  : Why did your result drop ?
Boy : My girlfriend just dumped me..

BD  : Why did you fail your last paper ?
Girl  : I just knew that my boyfriend cheated on me ..   

SEE ??

he told us that, very little chance that your partner in university will be your partner in the future - husband..wife...you got out of university, you go to work...you'll meet new people..much more pretty..much more handsome..kinder...younger...smarter...whatever~ so, just close your heart for others...but for now only...open it when you're ready~


He told us kinda lots of story of his experience in handling a few cases .. I will only put two story as it's the only story that is fresh and detailed story in my mind .. ( since it's regarding religion, it have to be precise and detail )

1st CASE 

*BD stands for BROTHER DAUS

A group of people@student met him said that they want to apostate ... they want to become a christian ..
BD      : WHY ?
THEM : Christanity is easy ... can drink..smoke..do sex..for women,no need to cover aurah...and many     more...
BD      : THAT'S STUPID ! (he's not saying the religion is stupid.. NO ! what he meant is the thinking of the group that takes it quite lightly)..Christanity don't allow you to drink..drunk...you can't do sex(bfore marriage=zina)..and you can't wear sexy clothes...
THEM : But why did we see christians drink,smoke and etc .. ?
BD      : Because they're bad christians...which will end up in hell according to christanity ... the same goes to Islam ..to being a muslim ... why do you have to choose the other way, if you'll end up in the same destination which is hell ?? If you becomes a bad christian, you'll end up in hell...If you becomes a bad muslim, you'll end up in hell as well .... SAME RIGHT ?

So, that group think and so, till now, ALHAMDULILLAH, they're still in ISLAM ... while BD and his friends@member@whatever are trying hard to make them to become a good muslim ...

2nd CASE

There's a case of a 15-year old girl pregnant..and a 17-year old boy is the father for the baby ...
The boy's family wanted the girl to abort the baby..but then, BD said "you've committed a very big sin which is ZINA. and now you want to commit another big sin which is killing ??? It's better if you keep the baby...repent your sin by being a good father and mother and takes VERY GOOD CARE of the baby" so, the girl didn't abort the baby...and they were asked to get married...during the NIKAH ceremony, the boy needs to recite the 'KHUTBAH NIKAH' that lines up the responsibilities of a husband and a father ... and that boy cried during reciting it..since he knew himself that it's pretty much impossible for him to do all of it...17-year old !! working ??!! everyone during the ceremony were crying ..(sad that their daughter..son..have to get married at a very young age..not knowing the hardships of life yet..) ...

SO, BEFORE YOU DO SOMETHING FOOLISH, THINK OF THE CONSEQUENCES FIRST !!

there's a lot of things that he share with us.., he's a very good lecturer...he knows how to attract students..he uses different approach than other Ustaz or ustazah ....insyaALLAH, I will share more  things that I'll get in the future~ sharing is caring and caring is loving..and I love everyone that want to become someone good and better...


  

Sunday 10 June 2012

Freshgirl in UNI life 2

Assalamu'alaikum ~~



All praises to ALLAH ( Alhamdulillah ), I've safely arrived at IIUM Gombak Campus yesterday.  Quite a tiring day - all those packing and unpacking stuff seriously making someone drench in sweat BUT our campus is down the hill which means, we're sweating but the temp is COOL !!


......................................................................................................................................................................


Seriously, never thought the campus that I went 2 years ago as an observer for an english debate competition will be my campus ! (Mahallah yg sme plak tuu)..





First time msuk blik die, sgt la terkejut sbb dapat yg satu compartment 2 org..sgt cramp ~ bayangkan, compartment utk 1 org ngan compartment utk 2 org saiz die sme je ~ tapi bile mengenangkan sahabat2 yang tgh struggle hidup kt kampus PJ tu, rse sgt bersyukur sgt2 !! 


Kalau kt PJ , panasnye huiihh !! toksah dok cite la. Kehangatannye membara ~ tapi kt situ, nk gi kelas xjalan jauh sgt ... 
Kalau kt Gombak nie, makngaih !! sejuuk gler ~ malam2 memang sejuk~ bangun2 suara seksi-seksa sgt ! tapi nk pi kelas, jalan mmg jauh ~ imagine, 1km in the morning, 1km in the evening ... 

perhh !! it's really an exercise until to the extend, my friend's mum said to her > " Kalau kamu xkurus lagi, mak xtau la ~ " dah tu ade female sport complex plak tuu ... 

TAPI TAPI TAPI !! 


swimming pool die bkak weekdays je .. 5pm ke atas... kami kami dak foundation ni kls dah la pack..smpi ke petang ..dah tu nk balik ke mahallah dah jauh... kang msuk2 swimming pool, kaki cramp terkejut ... jalan byk2 pstu pi terjun air ... weekend xbukak .. memang la sisters dok dlm bilik mengembangkan badan je kejenye..dah xde bnde boleh buat ... xpe2 ... weekend ikat perut ~ haha...


But, I really hope the bi'ah in here will be nearly the same with the one at my old school ...
Ak ni pon bukannye baik sgt ... byk lagi bende yg kne blajar ~ untung dpt sme compartment ngan sorang dak dq ~
Tapi walau ape pon, kne blajar utk mlakukan byk sacrifices kt sni... 1 sacrifice is living in a small room ... memang xselesa, tapi lebih selesa daripada mereka2 yg kat pj .. zaman Rasulullah dulu pon tentu-tentunya facilities xbyk ... so, ble dh ade facilities kt keliling ni, kne la pndai menghargai ~ dan cara nk menghargai is dengan menggunakannya dengan sebaik-baiknye, sehabis mungkin la.. (org dah bgi, gune je ~)


Eventhough sni dipanggil islamic university, ade je yg msuk yg sblum ni xde basic arab...ade je yg msuk sni sbnarnye free hair...ade je yg msuk snie xde basic agama sgt..ade je yg msuk sni mengaji masih merangkak...
TAPI itu bermakna,
 ALLAH ingin memberi mereka-mereka, kami-kami, satu environment yang sgt boleh dijadikan turning point..bak kate ade sorang brother senior ni, --> msuk sni, tutup bku lame..
kalo dlu kte jahat, tutup cte tuu..tokse diungkit mlainkan utk pengajaran org lain..
kalau dlu kte baik...pegang jawatan blambak, budak BADAR (Badan dakwah dan kerohanian), tutup bku tuu dan jadikan itu pengalaman utk jdi yg lebih baik kt snie..


Tipu lah kalau xrse yg tanggungjwb sgt besar kt sni..
perasaan utk menyampaikan ape yg dh blajar dlu membuak-buak tapi ..........
kekuatan utk itu masih perlu dikumpulkan dulu ....
bukan senang bab2 mcm ni...
lagipon, ilmu yg nk disampaikan kne btul sahih, 
kalo salah ajaran tpi still iman ok, boleh lagi..
kalo salah ajaran smpi iman jdi goyah, ituu payah..

Saturday 2 June 2012

FRESHGIRL FOR UNI LIFE ~

woah!!~ today is like the last day i'm going to be non-employed..non-student !! (dah lbih kul 12 kre hari ahd dah la~)


ISNIN 4 JUN i'll be officially UIA's student...


seriously, xtau nk buat ape skang ni..
sblum nie minx maaacam2 scholarship~~
BANK NEGARA..KHAZANAH..DAN LAIN2~~
and the only thing I was called for interview is MARA...though it's just a study loan...
I choose australia for my 1st choice aaand UK for my 2nd choice...
yg sedihnye, me and my friends choose the same aand NO ONE got it !
only 1 person got it but he made it UK for his 1st choice (i think so..since this is the course MARA agrees to support him)..me and my friends were informed that people who chose that course (UK) mostly managed to get it......but as for our 1st choice??? hmm...i don't know about other school's student ..but my school...non of us got it...


It'll be one big fat lie if I said I'm not sad..not frustrated..not feeling down....  I did ... 
BUT 
How long do I want to stay unmotivated ? Forever ? Just for a study LOAN ?? hmmph.. NOT WORTH IT~


So I came up with LOTS and LOTS and VERY LOTS of good reasons of what that had happen so far..
 1 .  ALLAH know the best ... 
 2.  Maybe, my inner self ain't that strong enough to let me face the western culture ...
 3.  Maybe, my IMAN is not strong to let me go through years in a non-muslim country ...
 4.  Maybe, I won't score a very colourful flying marks .. and thus makes me HAVE TO payback quite a great sum of money ... and who knows ... My family's financial condition might not gonna be like now in the future ... so how am I suppose to pay it back ?? In debt forever ? whuuh..no no... Poor my future family (husband..kids...) 
 4. Maybe, I'll fall for western guy that is very mucho mucho handsome~ (haha..this is really one stupid thinking..)
5.  IIUM isn't that bad ~ it's an INTERNATIONAL ISLAMIC UNIVERSITY~ 
                                           # International ?           - check-
                                           # Islamic surrounding ? - check-
                                           # Payable ?                  - check-


 6.  Hmm..all the goodness is inside it... ( cam iklan minuman je.. )
 7.  I can strengthen my belief in ISLAM.. in RASULULLAH ... in ALLAH through the USRAH program...and so many more~



SO NOW !! To all my dear friends that might did not get their hands on what they want , remember this,
what we want can't always be the best for us... what we don't want won't always be bad for us ~


LIFE MIGHT NOT GONNA BE AS YOU PLAN, BUT IT'S ALWAYS ACCORDING TO ALLAH'S HAND AND IT'S THE BEST FOR US ...


REGRETTING A DESICION IS GOOD ...AS THAT MAKES YOU HUMAN BUT STANDING UP FROM REGRET MAKES YOU A BETTER AND STRONGER HUMAN


RAINBOW WILL ONLY FILL UP THE HEART AFTER A HEAVY RAIN ... SO, WEAR A RAINCOAT (IMAN AND AD-DUA') AND WALK THROUGH THAT RAIN WITH PROUD


NEVER EVER RUN FROM PROBLEMS AS IT'LL ONLY MAKES US TIRED OF RUNNING ..OUR ENERGY WILL BE FINISH OF ALL THOSE RUNNING AND SIGHING ... SO START DOING THINGS TO SOLVE THAT PROBLEMS...IT'S BETTER TO RUN OUT OF ENERGY SOLVING SOMETHING RATHER THAN RUNNING AND LEAVING IT UNSOLVED


(ala, macam main game gak...spatotnye kene bunuh zombi2..tapi kalo dok lari memanjang..time out..energy skit..zombi sume masih mengejar2...kite gak yg kalah akhirnye kan ?? )


TO ACCEPT (REDHA) SOMETHING IS GOOD ... BUT NEVER EVER ACCEPT AND NOT DOING ANYTHING (PASRAH) ... 


THE BEST WAY - ACCEPT IT, AND THINK OF A WAY TO MAKE WHAT HAPPEN A WIN FOR US .. ( jdikan ape yg jadi sbagai penggerak utk lebih berusaha..)




# oukay~ it seems my philosopher mode is turn on ! haha
 hope this can put anyone out there that have a problem to turn on their energy (you'll need very much energy to fight you know ?~)


UIA ~~ HERE I COME ~~ ( hoping sgt bi'ah die sme cm skola lme..klo lagi bgus ..lagi mantap!!~)

Sunday 20 May 2012

happy love

Assalamu'alaikum ~


Hey there folks !! Wat'cha doin'? ok, cut out the lame introduction, let's get straight to the bullet point ~


Lately, (ok, bukan lately, sejak abis sekolah sbnarnye..)
rata-rata sume dok ckp psl kahwin...
Frankly speaking, I thought only dak2 skola agama je giat berbicara dalam soal ni..tapi rupenye dak2 skola lain jugak...termasuklah tuan punye blog ni..keh!


# ade yg ckp psl nk khwin ngan bf/gf masing2..
# ade yg ckp psl nk khwin ngan org yg langsung xkenal..@ pilihan keluarga @ gune org tengah @ cm cite   Fatimah Syarha ngan Dr Muslih ..


Mcm2 lah pokoknye ...


Actually, the idea of writing this entry was triggered by a friend of mine ...
She asked something at our batch group in fb .. Something about love before marriage and love after marriage...


salam,, cuma nak tya,, boleh x hangpa tolong kongsi kongsi kisah cinta parents/kakak/sape2 yang hangpa tahu...seriously dalam hati aku rasa haram cinta sblom kawen tu....statement dia macam kurang tepat,, ya lah kan, zaman skarang susah nak jumpa yang langsung x bercinta sblom kawen,, aku sebenarnya confused la tambah2 xde pengalaman langsung bab2 bercinta nih,, aku takut aku terpesong bila dah jumpa orang y berjaya tawan hati aku,,weh tolong jangan su'uz zon kat aku sebab aku x tau nak tya kat sapa...dah tya kluarga sniri MALU LA sebab takot diorang ingat aku dah kemaruk sangat nak kahwin....ya semestinya kita kena kejar ilmu, tu yang paling penting,, tapi benda ni insyaAllah kita akan hadapai gak,, tu yang aku tya,, ulang soalan... bleh x crite pengalaman sape2 sblom kawen yang korang rasa diredhai Allah? bagaimana kenal,, cane nak guna orang tengah,, macamane nak jaga di alam siber,, alam nyata,, perlu ke bagitau semua orang kita nak kawin ngan dia (jangan gelak soalan aku),, btol ke x leh diam2 sorok2 bercinta dulu sblom kawen?? tolong2,,(panjang plak....^^) tolong2 jawab soklan aku... :')


Kite pon tau psl baik buruknye bercinta sebelum dan selepas bernikah...
Die minx kami kongsi story2 org yg bercinta selepas nikah..pokoknye, sebelum nikah tu xpnah jumpe pon ade...xpon, prnah jumpe tapi langsung xcontact..ade yg dapat petunjuk setelah istikharah..macam2 la pokoknye..Seriously, memang ade yang xprcaye sgt bende cm nie..katenye, knelah brcinte dlu sblum nikah..bru boleh kenal hati budi...TAPI KAWANKU, bukan ke kalo tgh brcinte tu, yg baik aje diserlahkan...yg buruk disimpan dalam2...then lepas kahwin, lepas setahun, bru nmpk belang...lepastu...cerai......payah jugak kan ??


MEMANG X DINAFIKAN YG XSEMUA MCM TU...


nak bukti bercinta selepas nikah itu ade and bahagia ?? nah, bace kat bawah ni..
100% dijamin KISAH BENAR !! untuk memastikan kisah2 ni betul, ak copy paste trus ayat2 sahabat2 aku (tp deme minx disembunyikan nama or dignti ngan ak or awak dsb)..so ni mmg 100% pure .. xde perisa tambahan ...

STORY 1
mak ayah aku kawin atas pilihan atuk nenek,, n mmg ayah aku xnak cari sniri..haha ♥


STORY 2
ayah ngan mak saya blaja di politknik yg sama..ibu ana kerek..tu yg ayh suka..ayh ckp ibu xgedik..pastu ibu smbg dgree kat u..ayah tros keja..masa ibu keja, rombngan ayh dtg..slamat..bhgia..diorg ta penah contct ..horhor....

STORY 3
Hurmm.... hurm.... sebelum kawin, ayah pernah nampak mak 2 kali je pastu terus masuk minang. Beli baju kawin pun sendiri2, nasib baik sama colour. Pastu cinta mereka pun berputik. Cewahh. Haha. 
Mak pernah cakap,nak berkawan ngan laki, berkawanlah, asal jangan jiwang2. Jodoh tu dtg sendiri. Tak perlu nak melayan perasaan sgt. Kalau rasa dah sesuai, terus la nikah. So ramai org berkawin sebab mereka dah berkawan pada asalnya. Sebab tu ada kes kisas kawin ngan kisas. Haha

STORY 4
mak ayah kte x prnah knal atau jmpe satu sama laen~ possibility nk trserempak 2 mmg x delah...ngeri lain2...university dyorg kat US 2 pon laen2 n jauh gler...org tgh yg kenen2kan mak ayah kte...


STORY 5
ok... i really wanna tell story about my parents.. my ibu and ayah both study kat UK. my ayah senior setahun. adelah join jemaah kat sana an. pastu, tetibe ayah rasa mcm nak kawen. suruhlah senior dia carikan siapa2 yg sesuai. and ibu, agreed to get married with ayah. lps 2,, diorg pun kawenlah pada 1 JANUARI 1991 and got their first child on 27th SEPMTEMBER 1991... and,, bile tgk gmbr ibu n ayah time kat UK sgtlah jeles. it was time when they are damn in love in a halal relationship.. so sweet!! n masa ayah kawen dgn ibu. ibu je yg dah grad. ayah belum gard lagi.. sekiannnn~~ citee saya korang dah tahu dah.. yg tu contoh cinta yang haramlah kiranya.. hiwhiw. whatever it is,,DO REPENT!

STORY 6
Ayah saya nan mak saya tak kenal pon tapi maktab sama . Ayah saya ni jenis memilih kalau nak berkawan dengan perempuan . tapi Ayah terpikat dengan mak pon masa ayah start solat istkharah . Ayah jumpe mak teruss jumpe ibu bapa mak tentang hajat ayah nak peristerikan mak bile ayah daa abes belaja . dan kerja as guru selama 1 tahun terus nikah . Alhamdulillah , sekarang ayah dan mak saya pon tengok cam pengantin baru jee . sweet sangat :D

STORY 7
ok.. ade lagi satu cerita yg lagi sweet habes.. cerita ni org tu cerita sendiri la kat aku. orang ni mmg org baik agamanya and family background pun mmg baiklah.. dia tak pernah kenal suami dia. tapi, dia selalu solat istikharah. satu malam 2, dia dpt petunjuk tntg nama suami dia. and drpd mimpi 2, dia tahulah nama suami dia 2 "i****". satu hari 2, dia ke kedai. tetibe dia nmpk sorg laki 2..dia rasa mcm pernah tgk. pastu, laki 2 pergi byr kat kaunter n org kaunter 2 sebut nama lelaki 2 "i****".. mula2 dia tak perasan n rasa pape pun.. bile dia smpi rumah, ada org kol.. org 2 tanya "tadi ada tak siapa2 kat rumah ni yg pergi kedai?". tyme 2 adek wanita ni yg jwb. adek dia ckp "ade. akak saya". tak lama lps 2, i**** 2 masuk meminang. n dia terima pinangan i**** 2. i**** ni adalah lelaki keTUJUH yg pinang dia. rupa-rupanya, i**** pun solat istikharah dan dpt mimpi mcm dia... sweett sgtt.. tak pernah kenal. tak pernah jumpa. dan sekarang, sangat bahagia!!. jeles tgk dia. dan, dia mmg org kuat ibadah. :)))) rindunya kat diaaa!!


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ok..tamat bab story mory...ni yg selain story mory tp nak letak gak..hehe :)

--> Ak xde cte yg boleh kongsi ngan ko..sbb ak sniri xtau cmne ayh ngan mak ak khwin..ak cme tau ayh ak duda time khwin ngan mak ak..tp mak tiri ak tu ak xtau pe cer...ak pon tgh brusaha menjaga diri ak n batas ak dlm brgaul..pokoknye, bagi ak, ak nk jdi wanita yg taat pd allah suami n nk didik anak ak cm fatimah syarha..huhu...# ok..cm lari topik plak..hehe..

--> Awak kene faham apa erti cinta yg awak kata haram tu. Ak pon sokong cinta jadi Haram kalo bersamanya ada maksiat yg nyata mahupun trswmbunyi. N ak sokong cinta itu halal andainya berpandukqn iman bukan nafsu dan dalam lingkungan syarak.cinta halal tu..kita akan rasa bila kita rasa dqh bersedia utk pikul amanah n tggjwb yg besar utk brkeluarga. Imam hassan albanna kata.. Cinta yg halal itu halal..n yg haram itu haram. Mmg mungkin kita semua ada kisah silam..hor hor. Tp tak trlambat utk kita ukirkn kmbali kehidupan kita dlm mncari cnta halal.bg ak,cinta halal ialah cinta kepada manusia yg disandarkn utk mncari cinta Allah yg sebenar ;) *trpanjang plak.hor horr

--> boleh baca post hilal asyraf dekat web dia : motivasi sblm aku bernikah . banyak . bg aku , boleh jd panduan org2 muda mcm mana nk meletakkan cinta dgn betul .

--> aku baca buku sinergi tu ( wlpn da lama buku tu . haha ) dia kata . jgn jadikan redha Allah sbg wasilah dan cinta manusia sbg matlamat . tp jadikan cinta manusia itu sbg wasilah dan redha Allah sbg matlamat . aku smpai skrg xleh hadam lagi . spe yg faham boleh tolong terangkan ?? err

--> mksod hilal asyraf tuh, lebey kurang mcm akk ckp tadi. cinta manusia hanya dijadikan sandaran utk mencari cinta Allah. contoh nak senang, kita nak beli nikon d3100, kene ada duit, baru bole dapat nikon tu. duit tu umpama lelaki/suami/cinta lah. horhor..erm.faham tak?

--> kita takda apa apa cerita. haha. btw, bagi menjawab persoalan awak pasal bercinta sebelum kahwin tu, aku stuju dengan konsep hilal asyraf bercinta sebelum kahwin ni macam kita mempersiapkan diri kita untuk pikul satu komitmen, masa tu la kita belajar masak, belajar kemas rumah, belajar itu ini, macam macam lagi la sebelum bina baitul muslim. kita jugak akan kukuhkan fardul muslim kita. dari segi ikhtilat, banyak cerita dah yang aku dengar, antaranya dari senior kisas dulu dulu, ukhti tu cakap, masa kat mesir, ada lelaki masuk minang. lepas dah istikharah and terima khitbah itu, baru tau kisas. padahal masa masuk minang tu, tak tau pun laki tu siapa. bagi aku ini sangat sweet. :) and yes, kalau nak jatuh hati tu, takde sape boleh halang. itu fitrah dan islam meraikan fitrah. and you know what? apa yang boleh kawal fitrah kita dengan sangat baik agar tak terjebak ke dalam cinta penuh maksiat? semestinya iman kita. iman jadi benteng. so, dah masuk mana mana nanti, silalah istiqamah. sama sama doa agar kita jatuh hati pada lelaki yang betul. insyaAllah. :)

--> selalunya nak kenal hati budi sebelum nikah ni manusia yang rak serious. kalau dah nikah, kita akan terima baik buruknya automatikaly. kalau kenal sebelum nikah, tu yang banyak kes cerai tu. sebab sebelum ngan lepas nikah dah tak sama perangai. tapi kalau kenal lepas nikah, insyaAllah, cinta itu akan kekal kerana Allah redha. :D

--> beli novel cinta high class.us fatimah syarha dn farhan hadi.auuwww..so sweet :)) itulah pengalaman yg betul2 :))


ok, ni bku yg cinta high class tuu >>> 


ni blog hilal asyraf >> http://langitilahi.com/

ak ngaku ak bukanlah baik sangat...bukanlah sama cam Fatimah Syarha ..I do believe in love after marriage ... tpi yo lah, susah skit ... tp ak dah jnji ngan diri sniri utk jage hati n jage diri ... especially ble ak ade sebab utk itu...klo boleh, ak xnk ade pon number laki lain dlm fon..tpi tuu cm mustahil mengenangkan kt u nanti, kne gak berurusan ngan depa..so, ape yg boleh ak harapkan is ak xmelencong dari bende yg harus dibincangkan... GIRLS, JANGAN TUNJUK SANGAT SIFAT CARE KORANG EVEN KORANG PRIHATIN CMNE SKALIPUN...
well, sometimes memang ade bende baik terjadi after that tpi ... er... kome paham2 sniri lah ape mksud aku ni...and2, jgn tunjuk kemanjaan anda depan laki2 ... kang dah kahwin, die xheran dah ngan manja korang sbb dh slalu tgk ... better keep it and make it a surprise ... ^_^

after bace entry ni, terpulanglah pada korang utk buat cmne ... bak kate omputih, up to u .. don't blame others for your regret~
sumpah segan gler nk buat entry ni..ni pon dh berkali2 pker nk buat entry ttg bende ni  tp bru mlm ni dpt semangat..TERIMA KASIH SAHABAT2KU~~ <3 <3 <3


Barat kate, 'if you miss someone, look at the moon..and the face of your lover will appear there' 
tapi ak kate, 'Tatkala merindui seseorang, lihatlah bulan dan berdoalah kepada ALLAH agar perasaan itu tidak melebihi perasaan rindu utk bersujud padanya..tidak melebihi perasaan ingin ketemu Rasulullah dan tidak melebihin perasaan rindu pada keluarga sendiri - which is of course halal untuk dirindui .. <3 
nak rindu tunang boleh tp jgn over2..kang dah khwin xrindu sgt dah..biarlah time kahwin tu, brpisah skit pon dah rindu..pokoknye rindulah puas2..dah halal kan~haha'


IT'S IN YOUR HAND 

Sunday 13 May 2012

WISH of A GREEDY LADY ..

Assalamu'alaikum ~


In this late of night, don't know why but i have a sudden urge of writing...
I kind of left this blog for quite a long time due to my work and lacking of ideas to write..
Currently, I'm accepting the offer to enter IIUM's Foundation Studies in Ecomomics while waiting for an answer from MARA regarding the loan to further study in Australia...


It's not like I'm saying, the universities in Malaysia ain't good but ...


I want to experience what does it like to be far away from the people you used to know...
I want to know how does it feel to be having a complete stranger around you...
I want to learn what's the difference between Malaysian's thinking and outsider's thinking..
I want to be able to understand the real meaning of  'a total different environment'...
I want to carry out my duty as a MUSLIM in a complete non-muslim environment..
I want to feel the loneliness and excitedness of being independant...
I want to know the feeling of not having someone to rely on...
I want to taste the sweetness of relying 100% to ALLAH..




Seriously,


I can't wait to get my head drowning in words....
I want to be busy like I used to be..
I want to have a tons of work to do..
I miss the staying up late night to finish an assignment...
and besides, being busy will at least make no room for me to think about love...
to think about being love and loving someone...
I want to achieve my dream alongside with the love from my loved ones..
I don't want to search for love as I know and believe in someone...
As to not betray my own belief, I don't want to have any space for others ...


I want to struggle as hard and smart as I could...
I want to gain experience and money as much as I could...
I want to have a bright future...
I want to fulfill my family's hope...
I want to make my deal with someone come true..
And I wish to be able to accomplish all of those stated above...


As many wish I have for myself, I wish the same for my friends...
I wish for them to live their life happily...
I wish they can keep smiling whenever the cruel side of life is revealed day by day..
I wish they can achieve their dreams..
I wish for all of us to die peacefully while holding tight to ISLAM


That's it...
The WISH of a greedy lady ~~


^_^ -,- ^_^







Wednesday 28 March 2012

SPM LEAVER~~

Okey.........sungguh lah lama xupdate...
Kali nie, tentunya pasal lepasan SPM....
On that very date, 21 March, all ex form 5 students, get their result and so do I.........
Alhamdulillah, result aku ok.


But here, nak cite keadaan before ambil result...
Keluar2 sekolah je bulan December tu, rasa merdeka gilax!! Best sgt dh habis tension semua...
TAPI..............one thing I never thought will happen
Kerinduan Melanda~~~Baru keluar brape bulan dah rindu...rindu kat semuanya...
Seriously, rindu teramat rindu kat kisas..Suasana, kawan and semua2lah..





Everyday wishing for the time to rewind itself just for the sake of facing the same memories with all friends.
Graduated from highschool is so NOT cool.......Highschool is the most easiest, funniest, sweetest age ever!




But it's just a dream worth to be dreaming......Semua tu dah lepas..hidup perlu diteruskan..so, keluar sekolah tu start la semua lepasan SPM bertebaran di merata-rata tempat..semua kerja part time...termasuklah aku...seriously, kalau dah habis SPM, kena kerja!
Dapat experience kena marah, dapat experience letihnya kerja.  Macam-macam jenis manusia korang boleh jumpa kalo kerja nie..kalau yg kerja kat fast food restaurant tu, boleh jumpe awek kurus makan byk..boleh jumpe budak-budak yang macam2 ragamnya and pelbagai lagi lah lagat manusia...
Manusia kan UNIK???berbeza-beza and that's what make us human HUMANS ~


SPM -> MERDEKA -> RINDU -> Kerja -> RSULT?? -> MASE DEPAN 

Sekarang, kita cite pasal mase depan plak...
skrang nie semua tgh busy isi scholar sne..upu sne..carik u yg best2..
including me...



that other day, I was so eager to submit bnm's scholarship ASAP so, abis isi semua data die and setelah cm nak gler bukak web die yg asyik broken memanjang, tekanlah submit~~
then, ble view utk saje2 tengok balik, OH NO!!!!!!!!!salah isi!!!!!!!!
ekonomi A bkn A+...adesh~~
ble gtau parents, mmg kne marah lar..dieorg yg cm risau gler, smpi dok suruh call gtau salah..sruh email gtau tersalah tekan...
tapi yg peliknye, anaknye nie buat dek je..
Something in my heart tells that everything happens for a reason.  Memang aku dh check bfore submit tp xperasan langusng psl tu...



then, I remind myself, if that happens, ALLAH must already stored something for me...HE knows better than us humans...so, I'm not afraid and believe that I'm not alone.


but then, aku call la die, tnye how..then die ckp kalo dh ckup 8a, tu sume blakang kira...
dlm hati ALHAMDULILLAH YA ALLAH!!!!
see~~Allah knows the best..dapat ke xdpt scholarship nie, ALLAH lebih tau sumenye...
huhu...so, kalau yg sape2 nk mohon tp xdpt msuk ke ape web die, tenang2...
ade sebab knape tu semua jadi..mngkin kalo korang dpt isi but then xdpt korang frust gler ke or ALLAH tau  yg tu bukan lah yg terbaik utk korang..so, chillex okey?~





Past is let bygones be bygones
future is still a mystery
present is present, that's why it's called a gift
a gift from ALLAH
so, treasure it
and protect your future
by having faith in ALLAH and YOURSELF



Saturday 17 March 2012

poligami???hmmm~~~~

okey..nie mmg tajuk yang sangat menarik,tertarik lagi de bomb!!!
well, i know i'm in no place of saying this but this post is merely what i think as a girl, a women, a muslim and a human..
Firstly, the reason of writing this is because of some of my frens are talking about this and not to mention from my own experience...


What is poligami ACTUALLY??
Poligami is  when a guy (muslim) married more than 1 woman..This is allowed in Islam with some terms and conditions... That guy must :-
*rich enough to support his wives
*fair enough to all his wives ( EQUALLY FAIR) - sama rata in terms of nafkah zahir dan batin...
.
* look here  -->       


*have a solid reason to have more than one wives..
(not just for any stupid desire a.k.a. you-know-what-rite ;p)
* gaining your wife's permission is not compulsory but........................................if you still love your first wife, be nice and discuss it with her..
That is condtition from Islam view...


Now, let's see from my side of view as a girl..........


Story 1


" Daddy home!!!"...bila dengar ayah balik, si anak-anak apalagi...pergilah kerumun ayah depa yang baru balik dari outstation...hehe....termasuk lah girl nie...ye la...baru 12 tahun kan....tunggulah coklat ke teddy bear ke...ole-ole la pokoknye...yang si mak girl nie sibuk kat dapur nak masak buat suami tercinta..."nurul, tolong mak hidang makanan ni. ayah kamu tu nak makan." jerit si ibu dengan penuh kelam kabutnye..
tapi, satu adegan yang memeranjatkan berlaku............"ha?!!!tak siap lagi ke makanannye?aku nie dah la letih baru balik,ingatkan boleh terus makan.Dah seminggu aku takde kat rumah kau jadi pemalas kan!!LEMBAB!!" perghh!!!!!!satu tamparan yang teramatlah hebat...yang girl nie pun cepat-cepat lah tolong mak dia yang tengah menahan airmata dari berjurai....


Malam keesokan harinya, jam 10 malam, time anak-anak semua dah tidur kecuali girl yang ligat sembang ngan kawan dia..."abang, siapa Dini ? Saya tengok tadi mesej yang dia hantar lain macam je. Dia ganggu abang ke?" dengan penuh lembut si isteri nie bertanya..." "YANG KAU PANDAI-PANDAI CEK MESEJ AKU TU KENAPA?!" "APASAL KAU TANYA??CEMBURU??JANGAN NAK CEMBURU MEMBABI BUTA BOLEH TAK!! DINI TU KAWAN AKU. TAKDE KAITAN NGAN KAU!"
mak girl nie pon terkedu ...speechless...terpaku...and bermacam-macam ter lagi la...suami yg tak prnah tinggikan suara cm halilintar secara tiba-tiba mengamuk...


Hari demi hari, ayah dia makin pelik..dah jarang balik..kadang-kadang tu baik..kadang-kadang tu mengamuk cam singa...dan sudah berhari-hari jugalah si girl nie nampak ibu dia menangis kat tikar sejadah tanpa keluarkan suara (mungkin dia tak nak anak-anak dia tahu yg dia nangis)
Then, satu hari, si ayah kumpulkan anak-anak dia and gtau yang, dieorg akan dapat mamy baru....time tu, mak girl nie diam je sambil pandang karpet....okeh, si girl nie faham yang mak dia paksa rela utk terima madu......mmg depa anak beranak tak boleh nak bantah keputusan ayh dieorg tapi semuanya nak x nak je layan ayah dieorg and isteri barunya...ye la...


### kerana wanita itu, suami yang tak pernah naik angin jadi singa..
### kerana wanita itu, mata seorang isteri yang penuh dengan sinar bahagia sudah bengkak akibat terlalu  
       banyak air mata yang dibazirkan..
### kerana wanita tu jugaklah, seorang ayah yang selalu balik awal untuk makan bersama anak-anaknya
       sudah kerap makan luar dan pulang hanya bila anak-anaknya hendak tidur...


semenjak haritu, si girl nekad untuk tak percaya pada kasih seorang insan bernama lelaki....


.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-


Story 2...(dari sudut seorg wanita a.k.a. seorang isteri)


Crite nie based on filem lakonan Zizie Ezette...tapi aku xingat crite ape....lbey kurang cmnie la cte nye...


Ros dan suaminya hidup bahagia...kalo xsilap dieorang ada anak 3 org....satu hari, suami die pergi business trip....balik dari business trip suami die xbrubah pon...still gak baik,sweet n caring...


Satu hari, adik ipar Ros terserempak ngan abang dia n sorang awek nie mesra semacam kat shopping complex....Ble Zaki (suami Ros) dah tau yang adik die dah tahu hubungan dia dengan awek lain, dia nekad nak gtau isteri die yg die nak kahwin lagi 1...tp mse tu, Ros nie dah cam boleh bau yg suami die nie ade org len...well, instict sorang wanita kan kuat..apatah lagi kalo bab2 suami sniri nie kan~~


Ble si Zaki nie dah gtau secara rasmi kat Ros yg dia nak kahwin lg satu, si Ros nie bg jwpn nie : " kalo cmtu, abg bawak la dia jmpe Ros. Bawak la dia tidur snie semalam dua..boleh Ros kenal2 ngan dia.."


"Ros, ko nie bodohla..yg ko stuju ngan keinginan suami ko tu knape?eih..kalo ak la, mmg minx cerai tros..xsanggup..."


"Ak bukan ape Nita, aku cuma nak kenal ngan orang yg sanggup mmusnahkan kebahagiaan wanita lain.."


"Tapi bukan dgn ajk dia tdo skali ngan korang!!Tah la Ros..ikot suka ko la nak buat ape..kalo ko dah nekad, ak xbley buat ape dah.. Aku doakan ko bahagia la.."


Jumaat - So, si Bella nie ( awek suami Ros ) pon dtg la rumah Ros nie...malam tu, dieorg gi supermarket nak bli barang2 dapur..Ros, suami die n Bella...ble Ros n Zaki sedang berbahagia plih2 buah, si Bella nie pandang je...then ble si Zaki nie bhgia plih sayur dgn si Bella nie, Ros tu tgk skejap je then tros pandang tmpat lain...(xsanggup rsenye nak tgk suami sniri ngan org lain)


Sabtu - pagi tuh, Zaki cuci kereta ngan Ros...mmg scene tu bahagia sgt...ye a..kalo suami isteri cuci kereta msti ade main smbur2 air la...main2 sabun la...time nie, Bella tgh duk kat krusi smbil mnum air and tgk je dieorg....


Ahad - pagi tuh, si Ros tgh buatkan sarapan. Then :


" Ros, Bella xturun lagi ke??"


"Entahlah bang,tdo lagi la tu kot kat atas..abang pergi lah kjutkan dia"


"Eh xpe ke abg msuk blik die??Ros xkesah?"


"Bang, pergi je la, die kan akan jadi isteri abang and madu Ros xlama lagi....pergilah kjutkan dia..Ros nak siapkan breakfast nie..nanti boleh makan same2 ye bang..dah2...pergi.."


So, si Zaki nie pon naik la...sminit lps Zaki naik, Ros tros terduduk smbil mnangis...tgk filem tu mmg basah bantal nangis skali..teramat la sdeh...


Tapi ble Zaki msuk bilik Bella, dia tiada, blik tu dikemas and Zaki jmpe spucuk surat atas meja...Surat tu lbeh kurang ginie la bunyi nye...


' Kepada Zaki yang ku sayangi,


Bella terpaksa pergi dari sinie. Duduk kat rumah Zaki buat Bella rasa xpatot Bella musnahkan kebahagiaan yg sudah terbina.  Zaki dan Ros nmpak sgt bahagia bersama.  Bella xnak nanti sbb Bella, masjid yg abang bina runtuh.  Ros baik sangat ngan Bella even die tau yg Bella akan kahwin ngan suami dia.  Bg Bella, xsemua prompuan boleh cmtu. Bella rase, kalo kak Ros xbaik ngan Bella, mngkin Bella akan kekal trus dgn rancangan kite untuk menikah..tapi Bella xsnggup nak hancurkan hati seorang wanita yang sgt baik.  Abang jgelah dia baik2 ye.  Bella janji xkan muncul dalam hidup abang lagi.  Doakan Bella untuk dapat seorg lelaki yg terbaik buat Bella ok?. Terima Kasih atas segalanya . Kirim kan salam dan maaf Bella untuk Ros ye.
                         
                                                                                                                Salam terakhir,
                                                                                                                   Bella.                 "


-----------------------------------------------THE END--------------------------------------------------


STORY 1 - cbe korang lelaki bayangkan kalo korang duduk kat tempat girl tu??msti korang xske gak kan kalo ayah korang jd cmtu???
  So,kalo ada niat nak poligami,jgn lah act mcm tu..kerana awek lain, isteri dan anak-anak ditinggalkan...
  Kata nak ikot sunnah Rasulullah, then, ikot cara Rasulullah.  Rasulullah xprnah marah2 cmtu kan??
  Pker2 la sniri............


STORY 2 - ye, mmg wanita ada yang boleh stuju ble husband die nak khwin lain tp itulah kesdihan yg die prlu alami...so, jgn lupekan isteri first ye...


aku bukan membenci poligami. cme aku xsuke ble org gne alasan ingin ikot sunnah Rasulullah untuk berpoligami sedangkan tak ikot pon cre Rasulullah dalam berpoligami...Rasulullah berpoligami ada sebab..ingin membantu wanita2 yang lemah nie. Yg ingin berpoligami, cek dahulu apakah niat anda ingin berpoligami.  Kalo hanya hendak suka2 xberkat nanti...and fikirlah, jika isteri anda sudah mlakukan tanggungjwbnye dgn baik, knape anda ingin berpoligami..kalau die xboleh melahirkan zuriat atau tak buat tanggungjwbnye dgn baik boleh diterima lah kalo si suami ingin kahwin lain... kerana si isteri slalunya akan buat yang terbaik utk suami yg die syg..so, ble die dpt tau yg suami die ingin kahwin lain, msti die sdeh gler sbb seolah-olah suami dia xhargai ape yg die buat...Saya syorkan bacalah buku fatimah syarha, sebarkan cintamu..lebih mendalam tntang poligami nie...,


saya tekankan lagi, SAYA XBENCI POLIGAMI. cme saya tak suka kalo org nak poligami skadar mengetahui apa itu poligami tp xdalami btol2 apa itu poligami...


Sekian~~~































Wednesday 29 February 2012

Sakit itu kifarah dosa

Assalamu'alaikum...
Well, there's just something to write..
The other day, when I was sick, just a slight fever though...(a fever that didn't come in quit a few while..let's say, about 5 months....)
When fever struck me, something knock my heart..Something tells me that ALLAH THE ALMIGHTY GOD still loves me...still there..and always be there...They say, 
'Sakit itu kifarah dosa'...
It means, Allah still care about me..still want to lighten my sins...
AND this also means that Allah missed me!! When people are sick, they tend to pray more right??
So do I ...
I've been thinking, yes I did all the 5 prayer, recite the holy Qur'an but is that enough??


Ever since I'm out of my school, I don't think, I've cried to ALLAH about my problems..


I really miss the time of crying to HIM!!! But I just can't bring myself to it now!!
Have my IMAN gone down that terrible??
when at school, crying at the very corner where there's no person near you is easy but not at home
well, you can say, I don't want people to see my tears..I'm ashamed to let people know how weak I am..
and I don't want to answer questions like - ' Why are you crying?'
But now, I seriously miss the moment where I can cry freely in front of HIM
Well, this post is merely to say, appreciate the moment when you're sick 
Because that very moment is to say, ALLAH wants to lighten your sins and misses you.

Bersyukurlah kerana ALLAH masih ingin memberi anda peluang~~

Wednesday 22 February 2012

Working place...Travel!!

http://sila-tour.blogspot.com/

well, that is my working place currently...
if you want to go anywhere, go to that blog and we'll assist you !!
^_^

Thursday 9 February 2012

true friend 2

[VERSE 1]
We sign our cards and letters BFF
You've got a million ways to make me laugh
You're lookin' out for me; you've got my back
It's so good to have you around

You know the secrets I could never tell

And when I'm quiet you break through my shell
Don't feel the need to do a rebel yell
Cause you keep my feet on the ground

[CHORUS 1]

You're a true friend
You're here till the end
You pull me aside
When something ain't right
Talk with me now and into the night
'Til it's alright again
You're a true friend

[VERSE 2]

You don't get angry when I change the plans
Somehow you're never out of second chances and
Won't say "I told you" when I'm wrong again
I'm so lucky that I found

[BRIDGE]
True friends will go to the ends of the earth
Till they find the things you need
Friends hang on through the ups and the downs
Cause they've got someone to believe in
 
tu dia~~lirik true friends hannah montana.....agak2 korang dh jmpe blom true friend korang??
for me, ak dh jumpe true friend..siyes..ramai....from ak skola rendah smpi la habis skola...nk sbut satu-satu mmg ssh ar...tapi kan,kadang tu ak trpikir...sibok2 cari true friend, diri nie true friend sgt ke??
bg aku,dari
kenalan -> kawan -> rakan ->sahabat ->teman...
yg bley jadi peneman waktu susah and waktu senang..and of coz disbalik sume tu, syariah Islam jadi landasan...

kawan yg baik ialah yg sme2 nangis ble kte susah and sme2 gelak ble kte sng...
or
kwn yg baik ialah yg xnangis ngan kte time kte susah tp comfortkan kte and sme2 gelak ble kte sng..

tepuk dahi,tnya hati....


"ko marah ke??sory2..."
eh,xde la..mne ade....
"ye la kan,'someone' mne pnah marah...xpna tgk ko marah.."

nie la ayt yg sering ak dgr..bkn nk tunjuk yg ak nie xpna mrh...sb tipu la kalo ak xpna kan...human msti ade prasaan...tapi...ak xdpt nk mrh..ntah knape...
kdg tu,nk sgt cari someone yg bley ak mrh,(for reason yg btol la)
that's y ak ske tgk cte yg gado2 slalu tp syg (bg ak as fren la..)
so how ye??

ja~~sore dake desu...
feel free to give your mind~~